some people just wanted me to blog. so i did. it is coming back again. oh no, the exam jitters. i cannot believe it, i mean like is like WHOA! the prelims are here. and are NEXT WEEK next week!!!!!!! arhs. today is oral exam day 1. wasn't too nervous but have to admit i was. i kept denying it to freak. and he was like, "what?! wah lau. you not scared meh?" and he clutches his chest so dramatically and give me this open wide stare. and i gave him this: so-what-if-i'm-not-scared look.
and like so soon, it was my turn. i've been waiting for like 3h and it seems like 30 mins or something. kx was out so i had to seat the waitingchair. you had to seat a total of FOUR chairs, you know, tension. it makes people fell nervous. like you're going to have an interview with POLICE or smth. but overall i went well. umm, stumbled a bit, and wasn't as fluent as the prelims. soo, i wouldn't get full marks.....not that i really am so despo to get it or smth.
anywae, i trodged to the library and then it was like SUPER NOISY. but the noises are very muffled, like swarms of bees just buzzing and buzzing. so i went to where my frens were (bean, janne, chris, jin, lynn.....) and started jumping. and talking in my lower voice minus a volume notch down, excited to see my friends.... iwas like in a room of boys, with kx in front of me. bc at the back. and freak who keep on asking me.... and then :((( someone ( i shall not say who) said so ever sacarstically, "apparantly, cheryl, you are not suppose to make noise here." and then she smiled this wicked smile. i smiled back and ignored her. if i was in a bad mood i would just shoot out, "uh huh?! apparantly, if i make this teeny weeny voice. it wouldn't make a difference to how much noise there is in here." and i would smile this wicked smile.
you know.......she's was a friend last time. but now, it seems that she's bei ng so cold and i don't know her anymore. she is just beginning to drift apart. she only calls for my help when she needs it. besides that, she just seems like she doesn't know me. i don't bel,ieve she even treats me as a best friend last time. compare it to what she's treating me now. garbage, more like it. in school, she seems like she's forced to be my friend. because, the friends i hang out with is who she wants to hang out with. i have no idea how come she detests me like that. i mean, it came so suddenly.
oh. maybe i'm stupid or smth and my intellectual ability does not match up to her oh-so-mighty IQ level? i don't think that's the case cos i don't think she's very smart. she wants pple to think she's smart. she thinks she's smart. but other pple don't think she is. no offence. maybe she thinks i'm bossy and that i love to control pple or smth. and that i want to show the world that i'm better than you? i dono, she's giving me that attitude. that i've done smth wrong. but hello? i don't think i did. n i noe that she have a competitve (over) nature, but i'm not that good am i????? so what's wrong. i mean, if given the same opportunities, she might shine too...
i still have no inkling. and when i ask ---- (sm1-you would pester her if i tell), she just asks me how i know if it's true. omg, it's sooooooooo very obvious and...urgh.
i'm like smsing her to patch up or smth. indirectly of couse. and she replies me so sacarstically. "ohh, it went fine (i was asking about her oral). u did very well right? you confident of getting full marks right?" i replied, and she didn't reply back. and so i went to sleep.......